Every good, dumb action movie deserves a sequel, and 2016’s “Uncle Joe Threatens to Beat Up Donald Trump” is no exception.
This year’s spring blockbuster, “Uncle Joe Threatens to Beat Up Donald Trump 2: Electric Boogaloo,” may have been even more successful than the first, with the hair-plugged former vice president facing off yet again with his amber-coiffed adversary, who now occupies the Oval Office. It’s left crowds everywhere on the edge of their seats, asking themselves who will end up winning.
Well, if we get footage of Joe Biden getting testy when a reporter asks him about it and losing his cool, the answer is simple: all of us.
Let’s start at the beginning of the movie. Biden, speaking at the University of Miami on Tuesday, referenced his 2016 remarks about wanting to beat Trump up after the “Access Hollywood” tape emerged.
“They asked me if I’d like to debate this gentleman, and I said no,” Biden said. “I said, ‘If we were in high school, I’d take him behind the gym and beat the hell out of him.’”
“I’ve been in a lot of locker rooms my whole life. I’m a pretty damn good athlete,” Biden continued. “Any guy that talked that way was usually the fattest, ugliest SOB in the room.”
Biden, by the way, is polling as the early frontrunner for the 2020 Democrat presidential nomination, so the next time I hear anyone on the left talking about Trump’s a) hair or b) presidential demeanor, I’d just like to point them to the fact that a senescent plagiarist and member of the Hair Club for Men who likes issuing minatory threats against the president is their most likely alternative. But I digress.
President Trump went to Twitter to respond to Uncle Joe’s latest foray into fighting words:
Crazy Joe Biden is trying to act like a tough guy. Actually, he is weak, both mentally and physically, and yet he threatens me, for the second time, with physical assault. He doesn’t know me, but he would go down fast and hard, crying all the way. Don’t threaten people Joe!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) March 22, 2018
Biden was on Capitol Hill Friday when he was asked about the tweet.
“Do you care to respond to the president’s tweet, sir?” NBC reporter Mariana Atencio asked Biden, according to The Hill.
“Oh, no,” Biden responded.
“No response? Would you really fight the president, sir?” Atencio followed up.
“I was talking about high school,” Biden responded curtly. “Go back and read what I said. I said high school.”
Oh yes, clearly. That makes things much better. Thanks for clarifying.
I suppose one can question the wisdom of responding to Joe Biden’s physical threats on Twitter. But at this point, why the heck not? Biden has embarrassed himself thoroughly on this matter for two years now yet keeps on getting a pass from the media. Sunny Hostin of “The View” even called Biden’s remarks “kind of chivalrous” while noting that the president is “such a bully, such a bully.”
Perhaps the president was highlighting for his supporters the double standard when it comes to making physical threats against public figures, especially when Biden was the one who started it. Or maybe he was just having fun with a certifiable coot who entertains fantasies of remaining a high school bully well into his 70s.
I suspect the latter, but either way, Biden and Trump have managed another bona fide hit at the box office. I can’t wait for trilogy’s 2020 finale, “Uncle Joe Threatens to Beat Up Donald Trump 3: The Revenge of Neil Kinnock.”